Looking after yourself
Your mind and body are completely interlinked. Anything that affects one will inevitably affect the other. Being aware of how you can support yourself through self-care techniques and general lifestyle changes can lead to better physical and mental health as well as an improved quality of life. Implementing a healthy lifestyle can prevent problems from developing or potentially worsening.
There are a wealth of different self care techniques that are readily available within your local community, through the internet or by speaking to a health care professional. Some of the self help techniques you may be familiar with are books on prescriptions, apps, exercise, keeping a mood diary, identifying what your stressors are and accessing free support from talking therapies.
What you need to know
Lifestyle Changes
Making changes to your lifestyle can help relieve symptoms of physical and mental illness such as stress, anxiety and depression,. It is advisable to seek advice from a health care professional before making any drastic changes to your lifestyle. Exercise plays a big role in making positive lifestyle changes - this can be something as simple as going for a regular walk - and it's free! Accessing social support or joining a new group and even just getting better sleep.
Sleep
It is important to prioritise sleep as it can have a big impact on your mental health. However this isn’t easy when you're pregnant or have a small baby. This is the time to call in favours - friends may be really happy to take your baby out in the push chair so that you can relax and maybe even take a nap. Also, don’t be tempted to rush round catching up on jobs as soon as your baby is asleep-you need your rest too!
Better Sleep tips:
- Where possible, try to stick to a regular sleeping pattern
- Be active during the day
- Do something relaxing before going to bed, such as listening to music or having a bath
- Learn some simple breathing exercises or mindfulness techniques
- Have an hour of screen-free time before bed
- Avoid caffeine, alcohol and sugary foods before bed
Diet
Eating a well-balanced and healthy diet is essential for our overall physical and mental health. Eating a healthy diet is known to lessen the risk of developing certain diseases, reduce the risk of developing type 2 diabetes and obesity.
Recent research show that our gut has a direct link to our mental health - so much so the gut is referred to as the second brain. New evidence is emerging which indicates that inflammation is linked to depression. Drinking water can alleviate symptoms of fatigue.
Smoking
We know that it can be difficult to stop smoking, if you have made the decision that you want to stop smoking there are a number of different support networks that you can access for free. Speak to your practice nurse, midwife, health visitor or GP about local schemes that you can access to help you achieve your goal.
Drugs and Alcohol
Taking drugs can be harmful to your physical and mental health both in the short and long term. If you would like to stop taking drugs or talk to someone about your circumstances you can contact your local support service for further advice.
Similarly alcohol can negatively affect your mood-see our separate page for more information including help to stop drinking in your area.
Alcohol is a depressant and causes chemical changes in the brain. Although it might make you feel more relaxed in the short term, regular alcohol lowers your levels of serotine (a hormone that helps to regulate your mood) and can lead to low mood . Regular alcohol consumption can also have a negative impact on your relationships and on the quality of your sleep, making you feel tired and sluggish (Drinkaware, 2016).
For more information about current guidance, visit Drinkaware.
Building positive relationships
Evidence shows that having positive relationships can help us to live longer and happier lives with fewer mental health problems (Mental Health Foundation, 2018). Positive relationships give us a purpose and a sense of belonging. Positive relationships are important no matter how old you are. For babies, children and young people, having positive relationships is key for their mental development and wellbeing (Mental Health Foundation, 2018). The couple relationship between parents is also important for a child’s emotional wellbeing (OnePlusOne, 2015). So if you are having problems with your relationships, there is no better time to seek help than when you are pregnant or have a small baby. There is lots of support available - you can seek support from your health visitor, GP, Relate or talking therapies. There will be a better time to take time to sort out other aspects of your life such as debt or domestic abuse which can seriously impact your wellbeing.
Useful Links
When should you worry?
Newborn
NEWBORN
Contact your health visitor or GP if your baby is newborn and they…
- Feel very stiff, for example:
- Hold their arms and legs in the same position, such as always pulling their arm into their chest, or always crossing their legs
- Find it difficult to change their position on their own
- You may also find it difficult to move your baby’s arms or legs, making it tricky to change their nappy or clothes
- Feel very floppy, or have floppy arms or legs when awake
- Move their arms and legs in repetitive jerky movements, or writhing movements
- Don’t have a Grasp Reflex (doesn’t grab your finger or small object when you put it in their hand)
- Are often startling and you cannot understand why
- Move one side of their body more than the other, for example:
- Rarely moves one of their arms compared to the other arm
- Rarely moves one leg compared to the other leg
- When your baby startles, one side moves or looks different from the other
6-8 weeks
6-8 WEEKS
Contact your health visitor or GP if your baby is 6-8 weeks and they…
- Feel very stiff, for example:
- Hold their arms and legs in the same position, such as always pulling their arm into their chest, or always crossing their legs
- Find it difficult to change their position on their own
- You may also find it difficult to move your baby’s arms or legs, making it tricky to change their nappy or clothes
- Feel very floppy, or have floppy arms or legs when awake
- Move their arms and legs in repetitive jerky movements, or writhing movements
- Have not started to bring both their hands to their face, or do not move their arms much
- Keep their hands fisted, and you find it difficult to open their hands
- Can’t lift their head when lying on their tummy
- Move one side of their body more than the other, for example:
- Mostly moves one arm or mostly brings one hand to their face
- Rarely kicks or moves one leg compared to the other leg
2-3 months
2-3 MONTHS
Contact your health visitor or GP if your baby is 2-3 months and they…
- Feel very stiff, for example:
- Hold their arms and legs in the same position, such as always pulling their arm into their chest, or always crossing their legs
- Find it difficult to change their position on their own
- You may also find it difficult to move your baby’s arms or legs, making it tricky to change their nappy or clothes
- Feel very floppy, or have floppy arms or legs when awake
- Move their arms and legs in repetitive jerky movements, or writhing movements
- Have not started to bring both their hands to their face, or do not move their arms much
- Keep their hands fisted, and you find it difficult to open their hands
- Can’t lift their head when lying on their tummy
- Move one side of their body more than the other, for example:
- Mostly moves one arm or mostly brings one hand to their face
- Rarely kicks or moves one leg compared to the other leg
3-4 months
3-4 MONTHS
Contact your health visitor or GP if your baby is 3-4 months and they…
- Have lost skills which they could do before
- Feel very stiff, for example:
- Hold their arms and legs in the same position, such as always pulling their arm to their chest, or always crossing their legs
- Find it difficult to change their position on their own
- You find it difficult to move your baby’s arms or legs, making it tricky to change their nappy or clothes
- Feel very floppy when awake
- Prefer to keep their arms by their sides. For example, they do not reach for things, or do not bring their hands together over their face or tummy
- Move their arms or legs in repetitive, jerky, or strange ways
- Still need you to support their head, or can’t lift their head when lying on their tummy
- Have very tight fists and it’s hard to open their hand
- Move one side of their body more than the other, for example:
- Rarely use one of their arms to pick up toys
- Rarely kick one leg compared to the other
4-6 months
4-6 MONTHS
Contact your health visitor or GP if your baby is 4-6 months and they…
- Have lost skills which they could do before
- Feel very stiff, for example:
- Hold their arms and legs in the same position, such as always pulling their arm to their chest, or always crossing their legs
- Find it difficult to change their position on their own
- You find it difficult to move your baby’s arms or legs, making it tricky to change their nappy or clothes
- Feel very floppy when they are awake
- Move their arms or legs in repetitive, jerky, or strange ways
- Move one side of their body more than the other, for example:
- Rarely use one of their arms to pick up toys
- Rarely kick one leg compared to the other
- Are unable to roll, or can roll in one direction but not the other
- Find it difficult to reach their arms out. For example, they do not reach for toys
- Still have their early reflexes, like the startle reflex and grasp reflex
- Keep their legs flat when lying on their back. For example, they do not bring their feet to their chest
- Still need you to support their head
6-9 months
6-9 MONTHS
Contact your health visitor or GP if your baby is 6-9 months and they…
- Have lost skills which they could do before
- Feel very stiff, for example:
- Hold their arms and legs in the same position, such as always pulling their arm to their chest, or always crossing their legs
- Find it difficult to change their position on their own
- You find it difficult to move your baby’s arms or legs, making it tricky to change their nappy or clothes
- Feel very floppy when they are awake
- Move their arms or legs in repetitive, jerky or strange ways
- Move one side of their body more than the other, for example:
- Rarely use one of their arms to pick up toys, or eat and drink
- Rarely kick one leg compared to the other
- Can’t sit without support. For example, they lean on their hand, or, when they sit, their back is very curved
- Still have their early reflexes, like the startle reflex and grasp reflex
- Keep their legs flat when lying on their back, for example, do not bring their feet to their chest
- Still need you to support their head
- Still need you to help turn their head when lying on their back
- Can’t crawl, or find it hard, for example, drags one of their legs behind them
- Find it difficult to stand, for example:
- Can’t stand with support
- Doesn’t try to pull themselves up to stand
- Can’t move a toy from one hand to the other
- Doesn’t use both hands to hold larger things
9-12 months
9-12 MONTHS
Contact your health visitor or GP if your baby is 9-12 months and they…
- Have lost skills which they could do before
- Feel very stiff, for example:
- Hold their arms and legs in the same position, such as always pulling their arm to their chest, or always crossing their legs
- Find it difficult to change their position on their own
- You find it difficult to move your baby’s arms or legs, making it tricky to change their nappy or clothes
- Feel very floppy when they are awake
- Move their arms and legs in repetitive, jerky, or strange ways
- Use one side of their body more than the other, for example:
- Lean to the side when they sit
- Use one arm to pull to stand more than the other
- Rarely use one of their arms to pick up toys, or eat and drink.
- Rarely kick one leg compared to the other
- Find it difficult to sit, for example:
- Only sit with support
- Lean on their hand when sitting
- When they sit their back is very curved
- Can’t move a toy from one hand to the other
- Don’t use both hands to hold larger things
- Don’t point to objects
- Can’t crawl, or find it hard, for example, drags one leg behind them
- Find it difficult to stand, for example:
- Can’t pull themselves up to stand
- Find it hard to pull themselves up. For example, they only use their arms and don’t push with their legs
- Can’t stand with support
2 months
Your Baby By Two Months
Social/Emotional Milestones
- Calms down when spoken to or picked up
- Looks at your face
- Seems happy to see you when you walk up to her
- Smiles when you talk to or smile at her
Language/Communication Milestones
- Makes sounds other than crying
- Reacts to loud sounds
Cognitive Milestones (learning, thinking, problem-solving)
- Watches you as you move
- Looks at a toy for several seconds
Movement/Physical Development Milestones
- Holds head up when on tummy
- Moves both arms and both legs
- Opens hands briefly
4 months
Your Baby By Four Months
Social/Emotional Milestones
- Smiles on his own to get your attention
- Chuckles (not yet a full laugh) when you try to make him laugh
- Looks at you, moves, or makes sounds to get or keep your attention
Language/Communication Milestones
- Makes sounds like “oooo”, “aahh” (cooing)
- Makes sounds back when you talk to him
- Turns head towards the sound of your voice
Cognitive Milestones (learning, thinking, problem-solving
- If hungry, opens mouth when he sees breast or bottle
- Looks at her hands with interest
Movement/Physical Development Milestones
- Holds head steady without support when you are holding him
- Holds a toy when you put it in his hand
- Uses his arm to swing at toys
- Brings hands to mouth
- Pushes up onto elbows/forearms when on tummy
6 months
Your Baby By Six Months
Social/Emotional Milestones
- Knows familiar people
- Likes to look at self in a mirror
- Laughs
Language/Communication Milestones
- Takes turns making sounds with you
- Blows “raspberries” (sticks tongue out and blows)
- Makes squealing noises
Cognitive Milestones (learning, thinking, problem-solving)
- Puts things in her mouth to explore them
- Reaches to grab a toy she wants
- Closes lips to show she doesn’t want more food
Movement/Physical Development Milestones
- Rolls from tummy to back
- Pushes up with straight arms when on tummy
- Leans on hands to support herself when sitting
9 months
Your Baby By Nine Months
Social/Emotional Milestones
- Is shy, clingy, or fearful around strangers
- Shows several facial expressions, like happy, sad, angry, and surprised
- Looks when you call her name
- Reacts when you leave (looks, reaches for you, or cries)
- Smiles or laughs when you play peek-a-boo
Language/Communication Milestones
- Makes a lot of different sounds like “mamamama” and “bababababa”
- Lifts arms up to be picked up
Cognitive Milestones (learning, thinking, problem-solving)
- Looks for objects when dropped out of sight (like his spoon or toy)
- Bangs two things together
Movement/Physical Development Milestones
- Gets to a sitting position by herself
- Moves things from one hand to her other hand
- Uses fingers to “rake” food towards himself
- Sits without support
1 year
Your Baby By One Year
Social/Emotional Milestones
- Plays games with you, like pat-a-cake
Language/Communication Milestones
- Waves “bye-bye”
- Calls a parent “mama” or “dada” or another special name
- Understands “no” (pauses briefly or stops when you say it)
Cognitive Milestones (learning, thinking, problem-solving)
- Puts something in a container, like a block in a cup
- Looks for things he sees you hide, like a toy under a blanket
Movement/Physical Development Milestones
- Pulls up to stand
- Walks, holding on to furniture
- Drinks from a cup without a lid, as you hold it
- Picks things up between thumb and pointer finger, like small bits of food
Advice and Guidance
Self care and Prevention
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